Eva Longoria is cheating on Tony Parker…

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...with a fire hydrant.

This is a new one. I've heard of some girls gettin their freak on with all sorts of household items but this is definitely a new one for me. I guess Tony Parker couldn't put it down the way she wants. Don't worry Eva. Just call me. I'll help you out.

One other thing of note, she has a shirt that says that she wants more privacy. Are you serious? Then quit doing tv shows and movies, give back all the millions of dollars you've earned and divorce Tony Parker and marry a regular guy... such as myself.

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[Images via On 205th]